Invitations: A Private Invitation
by BevNPicard
Summary: Beverly finds the courage to try to move forward with her relationship with Jean-Luc


.....in the immortal words of my five-year-old cousin, Lief, "Jean-Luc Picard is the bestest. That's why he's the Captain."

Paramount owns everyone and everything in this story. Please bow down to them. The idea for this story is mine.

This is a Picard/Crusher story. Yes, that means kissing. No phaser fire in this story.

"Resistance is futile . . . . but appreciated."  
Enjoy!!

By the way, I am NOT "going there" this time. Perhaps in the next story. ; P

**INVITATIONS**  
M. Chelsea Mack

**BOOK 1  
A PRIVATE INVITATION**

Jean-Luc,  
Have dinner with me tonight.  
My quarters 2100 hours.  
Don't be late. Bring the wine.  
I want the real stuff.  
Beverly

Captain Jean-Luc Picard sat on the sofa in his ready room, with an amused grin on his face. He held the hand written note between his fingers.

*Hand written,* he thought. *That's something you rarely see.*

He brushed the paper under his nose, reeling at the scent of her lingering on the page. He looked at the exquisite flowing letters on the page.

*Beautiful, just like everything else about her.*

Beverly had put the sealed envelope in his hands as she had left the staff meeting that morning. She had smiled brightly, eyes shining and then had given him a mysterious wink.

That wink had sent his mind reeling into places he really rather not go to alone in his mind. They were thoughts he wanted to explore with a certain red-head up close and personal. She had turned him down when he had brought up the subject of them furthering their relationship, after Kes-Prytt. He had respected that choice, and wasn't going to push it. He hated her choice, but he would try to live with it. But, oh, that wink hinted of a lot more than just a friendly dinner.

He spent the rest of the day, on the bridge, with an amused grin on his face, while thoughts of what he'd love to do with Beverly ran rampant through his mind.

Will sat on one side of him wondering what was up with the captain. Deanna sat on the other side of him with an amused look on her face and knowing eyes watching him.

****************

Dr. Beverly Crusher looked at herself in the mirror. Scrutinizing every inch of her body. She wore a simple sleeveless blue dress, it hugged her body tightly, *Thank God, for Starfleet discipline,* she thought. And the dress ended about an inch above her knees. She had pulled her crimson hair up out of her face, but, let it fall softly down her back. She had to admit that she was very satisfied with what she saw. Her mind wandered to thoughts of what she was planning to do.

*What am I doing?* she asked herself as she felt a familiar fear creep into her body. She tried to force it away. *Beverly, this is what you want,* she reminded herself.

Somehow, no matter how much she reminded herself of what it was she wanted, the fear kept holding her back. But, not tonight. Tonight, she was going to seduce Jean-Luc, no matter how much the fear engulfed her. At least, that's what she planned on doing.

She thought of the dinner they had had months ago after Kes-Prytt. She had wanted to make love to him then, but the fear had taken hold. She was trying desperately not to let that happen tonight. Beverly figured that if she could take this one step towards Jean-Luc, the rest would be easy. The fear would disappear.

She moved into the sitting area, checking everything over one last time. The soft lighting was perfect, the candles on the table, the light music playing in the background. It all made a beautiful setting for what she had planned. She checked the dinner menu, again, just to make sure. Perfect. It was a light, delicate meal, beautifully arranged. Everything was gorgeous. Jean-Luc would be there anytime.

Beverly could feel the fear creeping over her, once again. But, she willed it away. *Not tonight, there will be no fear, I'm going to do this,* she thought. *I want this to happen tonight.*

* * *

"That was lovely," Jean-Luc said, as she poured the after dinner drinks.

"Thank you. I'll make sure to tell the chef you enjoyed your meal."

"I'm sure the computer will be overjoyed by the complement."

Beverly handed him his drink, gently caressing his hand with her fingers.

He was not imagining her soft touches. He thought he had been imagining them, but they were to frequent and deliberate to be anything but intentional. He hoped that everything he had fancied her invitation to mean was real and was not just his imagination playing games.

"Would you care to dance?" she asked lightly, leaning into him and brushing her hand across his shoulder.

"I'd be delighted." Jean-Luc could feel a familiar shiver run through his body as she took his hand in hers, bringing him towards her. She pulled him closely to him, he could feel the heat of her breath against his neck, feel the electricity running through both their bodies. He smiled to himself. They moved slowly to the music. Beverly  
rhythmically moved her hips back and forth so that she brushed against him suggestively with each movement. He held her tighter as his arousal became more evident.

"Have I told you how beautiful you look tonight?"

She looked up into his eyes, tracing his bottom lip with her forefinger. "Yes, but you can tell me often as you like," She smiled at him impishly and then replaced her finger with her lips.

Beverly nibbled a tiny path across his bottom lip, before she claimed his mouth fully. She was taking charge, she knew she had to. She knew that he respected their friendship too much to try to push her into anything, he would wait for her to take that first step. Now she had taken that first step, and what a step it had been.

He was amazed by the passion in her kiss, the urgency. He was overjoyed by her invitation. He responded to every touch, every movement of her body. Jean-Luc had waited too long for this moment to hold anything back. He moved his hands across her back, pulling her as close to him as was possible. His mouth moved over hers with the same determination as hers moved over his. They responded with passion for passion.

Beverly pushed every doubt she held out of her mind as she moved her hands across his body. His body held wonders she fully intended to explore. His hands caressed the back of her neck, sending shivers through her with his light touch. She felt his fingers trail slowly downwards the short distance to the zipper of her dress. As he gently began to unfasten her clothing, fear gripped her in terrifying intensity.

Jean-Luc felt her tense, felt her hands tighten, he stopped kissing her and pulled away from her just enough so that he could look at her. He saw the flush of her face, the desire in her eyes, but there was also something else in her eyes. Something that did not belong there at this moment. It almost looked like terror to him. "Beverly, I'm sorry. I didn't mean to..."

Beverly looked at him with wide, helpless eyes. "Don't be sorry. Don't ever be sorry where this is concerned. It's not you. It's me."

"I don't understand. If this isn't what you want, just tell me. I will understand."

She looked into his steel blue eyes and took his hand in hers. She was trying desperately to regain some of her courage. She had to find a way to tell him everything she wanted to tell him. If only she could find a little bit of her courage, again.

"This is what I want," Beverly said. "I just . . . I don't no. I can't explain it, I don't know how."

Jean-Luc led her to the couch. He looked at her with eyes that held all his love for her. "Try. I'm listening."

She took a deep breath. Trying to hold her courage in along with the much needed oxygen. After several long seconds, she slowly let out the breath and with it came the words . . .

"I'm terrified of this."

He brought his free hand up to her cheek, softly stroking her skin. "Of what, Beverly?"

"Of this," she said. "Of you, of me, of us."

"What terrifies you so much about us?"

"Everything. Needing you this much, wanting you, loving you. Everything about us is so complicated . . . and frightening. Even my feelings. That night after Kes-Prytt, I wanted to make love with you. I didn't want to say no. I wanted to scream yes to everything you were saying. But a sudden fear gripped me and I could not say the words I  
wanted to say. All I could do was leave."

A silent tear rolled down Beverly's face, Jean-Luc instinctively leaned towards her and kissed it away. "There is nothing to fear. I promise this isn't just something casual for me. I want something more with you. And I will never intentionally try to hurt you."

"Oh, Jean-Luc," she sighed. "There has never been any doubt in my mind about that. You are not what terrifies me so much. I am. You. I love you, more than anything else in this universe. How I feel about you . . . I can not even begin to describe. That is what frightens me. The intensity of everything. I fear that you will leave, that something will happen to you and you won't come back. Jean-Luc, if something was to happen to you . . . I don't know how I would survive."

*She loves me. She said it.* he thought. Now all he had to do was take away her fear. Not an easy task, but one he was willing to undertake.

"And then, I may live for a very long time. You can't just wait for something to happen to me. It may never happen. I love you, Beverly, I want you in my life."

"Most of my fears are because of Jack," She began. "When he signed aboard the Stargazer, I never thought that anything would happen to him. Somehow I thought we were immune to all the unknown dangers. I expected him to come home to Wesley and me. And then, without warning he was dead. It was so unexpected, so much like my parents' deaths."

Beverly looked at Jean-Luc, all the years of pain filled her eyes.

"The anguish I felt after Jack's death is something that I never want to have to go through again. Wesley was the only thing that kept me from completely falling to pieces. He was the reason I remained strong. Then, slowly I began to heal, the pain began to lessen. I left most of that pain behind me, and tried to move on with my life. By loving you, I'm setting myself up to feel all that pain once again, somewhere in the future.

"In my head I know that it is an illogical fear, that nothing may ever happen to you. But it's there, none the less, I can't stop myself from feeling this way. I've tried to tell my heart that I can't live my life on what could happens. It just doesn't seem to be paying much attention."

Jean-Luc kissed her on the lips lightly, but passionately, with no demands attached to it. She responded to his light lingering kiss. "I am not going to say that nothing will ever happen to me, both of us know that something could happen to either of us, at any moment, without warning. I can't promise that you will never feel the way you felt after Jack died. All I can give to you is the promise that I do love you. I love you unconditionally and without hesitation. Is my love for you enough to risk that kind of pain for? I really do not know. I do know that if you were taken from me today, I wouldn't mourn for you any less then if you had been my lover. My universe would still be empty without you in it. Beverly, I want you in my life, I don't care in what shape our relationship takes form in, as just friends or as something much more, it really doesn't matter. Just as long as you are here with me."

Jean-Luc brushed her cheek, bring his hand to rest at the back of her neck. He danced his fingers across her skin. "I won't pretend that I don't want something more then just your friendship. But, if all you are able to give to me is your friendship, I will be content with that. I won't love you any less. And I promise that I'll do my best to try to rid you of every fear that you have about us."

Beverly smiled as tiny tears rolled down her face, "You are doing a pretty good job at it already."

She shifted her body closer to his, giving him a slight kiss. She rested her head on his shoulders as she sighed in exhaustion. "I just need a little time, Jean-Luc. I have to take this slow. You and I have been friends for a long time, and I guess, I'm just not ready to have our relationship change so completely."

"We will take this as slow as you like," He said. Then he smiled adding playfully. "I think I might rather like playing the devoted suitor."

"The devoted suiter, hmmm? Does that me I'll be getting flowers and candy, romantic candlelight dinners and walks along moonlit eaches?"

"Anything that your heart desires, my lady," Jean-Luc replied, gallantly.

"Anything?" She asked with a grin on her face. "I think I'm going to enjoy this."

"I intend to make sure that you enjoy everyday. And when your heart finally catches up with your head," he said. "Make sure to tell me won't you? I'll be waiting patiently."

"I'm sure you will know, and I won't have to say a thing."

Jean-Luc smiled as he reclined back against the sofa, pulling Beverly tightly against his chest. She relaxed into him, going willingly. She could not reject the comforting warmth he was offering her. He moved one arm around her waist, resting his hand lightly on her abdomen. The other hand he used to softly caress her hair and cheek, brushing away the tears that she cried.

The pair sat on the sofa like this for some time, not speaking, but comforted by the other's presence. Beverly was glad she had found the courage to tell him that she loved him. Even though the inexplicable fear had engulfed her, once again, and she had been unable to go that final step and make love to him. She wanted to make love with, right now, but the fear she felt stopped her. *At least, he knows that I love him,* she thought. One day soon, she hoped, the fear would disappear and she would be free to love Jean-Luc in every way she chose to.

Jean-Luc was relieved to finally know how she truly felt about him. He had been afraid, more afraid then he was willing to admit, that she did not feel the same feelings that he felt. That all she wanted was to be his friend. He knew he could live with just her friendship. But, he also knew, that he did not want to live his life as only her friend. Right now, it was more than enough to know that she loved him. And in time, he would show her that there really was nothing to fear. Until then, he would be grateful for what he had.

Beverly slowly drifted into sleep. He recognized the shallow, steady breathing and knew that she was asleep. He pulled her more tightly to him, delighting in the feel of her sleeping form against him. He sat there marveling in her declaration of love. Was it possible for him to feel any happier? Jean-Luc did not know how long he had been sitting there before he pulled the sleeping form into his arms and got up from the sofa, moving towards her bedroom.

Beverly stirred in her sleep. He stopped walking, he didn't want to wake her. She turned her body towards his chest, wrapping her arms around his neck, snuggling into his warmth. She sighed in contentment, but, never awoke.

The feel of her body tightly pressed against his was sending shocks of electricity through his entire being. *She is making this almost impossible for me,* he thought. His body responded to the light touch of her fingers against his neck, the feel of her breath against his skin, the scent of her tickling his nose. He softly swore aloud as his arousal became almost impossible to deny.

*How I want this woman,* he thought, as he lay her sleeping body upon the bed. *I will want her until my dying breath.*

He reached across her, pulling the blankets down on the other side, and then he softly moved her over so he could tuck her in. Jean-Luc stroked her cheek, then her neck, moving across her shoulder and down her arm. He marvelled in the softness of her. He removed her shoes, setting them down beside the bed. He realized that the dress she wore wasn't the most comfortable sleeping attire, but, damn if he was going to undress her. He already needed a long cold shower. He wasn't about to test his self control any further.

He bent over her, kissing her lightly on the lips. "Good-night. I love you," he whispered.

She stirred and awoke at the feel of his lips. She sleepily reached out for him. "Please, stay with me."

*Damn, She is making this impossible.*

"Beverly, I need a *very long* cold shower. I think I should go."

His meaning was lost on Beverly, half asleep she hadn't caught the true meaning of his words. "Use my shower," she said groggily. "Don't leave."

He looked down at her, she was half-asleep and smiling, with a foggy look on her face. He could not deny her anything that her heart desired. "Of coarse I'll stay, if that is what you want."

"It is what I want. I need to know that you are here." Then, she drifted back into sleep.

*Is it possible to sleep with her and not make love to her?* He asked himself. It had been difficult on Kes-Prytt. But, then again, there they had a fire to separate them, they had not been sleeping in the same bed.

*I can do this. If this is what she wants, what she needs, then, yes, I can do this.*

Jean-Luc heard an inner voice sigh, "You can't do this." He decided that a shower couldn't hurt his already failing self control. He stood in her shower letting the freezing water run over him. It didn't seem to help, even a little. Jean-Luc got out and dried himself off, putting his pants back on. He left everything else sitting on the counter in the bathroom.

When he entered the bedroom the first thing he noticed was Beverly's dress laying on the floor beside the bed. He had been right, the dress wasn't comfortable to sleep in. Unfortunately for Jean-Luc not only had she taken her dress off, she had also left the blankets off as well.

Beverly lay on her stomach. Jean-Luc stared at her, the silky slip slid around her curves. Tantalizing him. The little self control the shower had left him with was slowly slipping away at the sight of Beverly laid out before him.

"Merde," he said. "I can't do this."

Jean-Luc sucked in his breath, moving towards the bed. *What was she thinking asking me to stay?* Chances were that she wouldn't remember her sleep-filled plea for him to stay. But, he did not want to take the chance that she would remember asking him to stay, and then find him not here in the morning. Jean-Luc did not want her thinking that he did not want to be here with her.

He slid into Beverly's bed, hugging the edge. Afraid that if he even touch her, he would not be able to control his feelings any longer. The movement of the bed caused Beverly to move closer to him, putting her hand on his thigh. *Please, don't let her be doing this,* he begged in his mind.

It was happening, though, Beverly snuggled closer into him, forming her body into the curves of his. *She's doing this, she is definitely doing this.* Jean-Luc was almost unable to take a single breath, he wanted to make love to her so badly. He had to remind himself that Beverly wasn't ready for that step yet. At least when she was awake she wasn't ready to make love to him. But in her sleep she definitely was telling him a different story.

Unconsciously, he slid his arms around her, making himself more comfortable. By the time he realized what he had done, it was to late to change his position. For fear of waking Beverly up. So, he lay there like that, with Beverly pressed tightly against him, trying not to think of all the things he would like to be doing to her at this moment. It wasn't working very well.

There would be plenty of time for that kind of intimacy, when Beverly was ready. After some time his body began to relax and sleep began to take hold. Right now, he would just revel in the feel of her and in the thought that she loved him.

With that thought, he fell into slumber, with the woman he loved wrapped in his strong arms....

THE END

By the way, for those who care, the pants worn by Picard in this story were painted on.

Until the next idea hits me

". . .If two hearts are truly bonded, if two people are meant to be together, they will find each other. No matter what obstacles come between them."


End file.
